Employee Evaluation Form


       SLEAZY SALES CORPORATION

EMPLOYEE EVALUATION FORM #0000810.09B

Name________________________   Date____________

KNOWLEDGE
____ The Son of a Bitch really knows his shit.
____ Knows just enough to be dangerous.
____ Only half a brain and is dangerous.
____ Fucking brain dead. His coffee cup has a higher I Q.

ACCURACY
____ Does excellent work if not preoccupied with office skirts.
____ Pretty good; only occasionally blows it out his ass.
____ Has to take off his shoes to count higher than ten.
____ Couldn't count his balls and get the same answer twice.

ATTITUDE
____ Extremely cooperative (if you kiss his ass frequently).
____ Brown noser in good standing.
____ Often pisses off co-workers; thinks it's his company.
____ Doesn't give a shit; never did, never will.

RELIABILITY
____ Really a dependable little cocksucker.
____ Can rely on him to be the first out the fucking office.
____ Can rely on him at the evaluation time.
____ Totally fucking worthless.

APPEARANCE
____ Extremely neat; even combs pubic hair.
____ Looks great at evaluation time.
____ Flies leave fresh dog shit to follow him.
____ Dirty, filthy, smelly, son of a bitch.

PERFORMANCE
____ Goes like a Son of a Bitch if there is any money in it for him.
____ Does all kinds of good shit at evaluation time.
____ Works only if kicked in the ass every two minutes.
____ Couldn't do less work if in a friggin' coma.

LEADERSHIP
____ Carries a chain saw and gets good results.
____ Better leader than fucking McArthur at evaluation time.
____ Occasionally gets told to get screwed.
____ Mother Theresa told him to get screwed.

I have been advised of and understand my rights under the Privacy Act
of the Inquisition.  I further acknowledge that I'm as worthless as dog
squat on a cow pie, but will try to correct my deficiencies in order to
achieve a higher  evaluation rating, disregarding all moral and ethical
standards.

EMPLOYEE'S
SIGNATURE_____________________________




Thanks to Paul Benoit